I'll start this off by talking about the spam e-mail I've gotten as of late, all concerning concoctions that allegedly increase the size of your penis. The first one I got was “Challenge Mike Myers As The Love Guru.” Yes, a reference to that film from 2008 that most people likely have forgotten by now. Plus, while I've only seen some clips from it I am pretty sure that the title character isn't some sort of sex machine type who has an enormous schlong. The other ones I got of note were “Germany Shows Portugal The Strength In An Extra Inch” and the incredible, “Tim Russert's Sex Scandal Exposed At Funeral.” Um, what? How in God's name did they come up with that dead celebrity to use to sell their scam product?
As for Monday, the only thing I did was go out with someone to a nearby restaurant, and this time it was a joint I hadn't been to in too long... IHOP. They now offer up chicken & waffles and I partook in that. It was tasty. What was even tastier was their 70's-riffic soundtrack they were playing. It was everything from the Doobie Brothers to a disco song or two even I hadn't heard of before, and my two personal favorites of the time we were there, Soul Makossa and Stevie Wonder's Boogie On Reggae Woman. I definitely was not expecting to ever hear tunes like that at an IHOP restaurant.
Tuesday through Thursday were dull. I didn't do much, aside from going to Walmart one day to get some random items. So, let me skip ahead to Friday, which had plenty for me to talk about. I actually went out and about, took a different way to go to a city I hadn't spent much time in, and I went on more than a short drive to see a wrestling show. What I did in the evening was go to Ybor City (a neighborhood right by Tampa that used to make millions of cigars and still now has up a bunch of old buildings and oddly enough is now a big nightclubbin' spot) to see an all womens wrestling show in a club. I know that makes it sound like I watched hot oil wrestling or ladies wrestling in their underwear. Rather, it was legit good wrestling involving talented lady wrestlers; it's better than most of the wrestling you see in WWE, as for the longest time they've had random models trying to wrestle and it usually does not turn out well. But before that... I went to a Trader Joe's for the first time ever.
Now, I've had some food from there in the past, but it was from other people who brought it back home from elsewhere. I had never been inside one before. Awhile back they first opened a store in Naples, which is a long ways away from where I live. A few months ago they opened the second store in Sarasota and on Friday I decided to go there. I did not take an Interstate route; rather, I decided to be different and went on back roads to get there. It would have been a better drive if not for all the dunderheads on the highway, doing such things as tailgating me; unfortunately that isn't a rare happening in Florida. Once I made it there, the store wasn't as large as I suspected, but they were able to pack a lot of items in there. It was quite crowded, which did get annoying at times. They have quite a unique variety of food and drink items for sale, and the prices are real good, so I was able to get a number of items for only 40 bucks and change. If they had one in Orlando I'd go there at least once in awhile. Sure, it's quite hipster-riffic in various ways (from the names they give some of their foods to how 60's music was the soundtrack of the store... note I am not hating on that; I thought it was awesome, as it reminded me of my youth when there were still oldies stations on the radio) but overall it was neat.
After that, I went through St. Petersburg via the awesome Sunshine Skyway bridge and ended up in Ybor City. I parked in a parking garage by a club that had a famous band playing there that night... GWAR! No kidding. That weird-ass band is still around. I walked to the show and price gouging aside (should a big plastic cup of Pabst Blue Ribbon really cost 8 bucks? Shame on that club) it was a real entertaining show. It was also nice seeing familiar faces I hadn't seen in far too long. After that I walked around Ybor City for a bit but I didn't go into any of the clubs. I had a feeling that there would be price gouging all over so saving my cash was the best thing to do. By far the most popular place there was a big dance club and most of the people waiting in a long line to get in... let's just say they were dressed as if they were going to an LMFAO concert. Rather silly, in other words.
Saturday I stayed at home and relaxed so I'll skip ahead to Sunday. While my favorite team the Bears aren't playing until tonight, I still went to Friendly Confines for dinner and as I figured it wouldn't be as busy as usual for a Sunday there during the NFL season (I was right), why not go there? I ended up having more to talk about than I expected. I watched all two games that were on at the time and I had dinner than dessert. I was at the bar (as always) and I only had soda for refreshment. At first, I sat not that far away from a skeevy-looking guy who at least wasn't an ass and he was also a Bears fan. After he left, in came some ladies, and one of them... she didn't make herself look real good. She was a loudmouth and she was dropping F-bombs like it was nothing. If she would have been a cool lady then that'd be one thing, but just from listening to what she was saying and how she was acting, she came across as a really NOT nice person, and that's a major turn-off. Once they left... oh boy.
Once those dames left, in came a pair of guys, and they were so stupid they reached a Ryan Lochte level of ignorance. I presume everyone has heard enough of Ryan's absolute stupidity to get my reference. While they weren't exactly like him (they didn't use “like” every third word as if they were a braindead 15 year old girl and they never said “Jeah!”) I am just talking about intellect. They had obvious Southern accents; they didn't help their cause but trust me I am not stereotyping them just for that. By the time they were there I was consuming my dessert; it is known as Strawberry Bites as it's pastry filled with strawberry filling and it's topped with ice cream and whipped cream. It's real good. One of them asked what I was eating and I had to tell them a few times the name of the food item I was consuming. It was more of the same when they were conversing with one of the female bartenders. They were so stump-dumb I felt bad at all the repeating that had to happen. I was starting to wonder if they were good at sniffing paint thinner; really, how else would you explain them asking her (I don't think they had met before that day) to babysit their Great Dane, get real offended when she simply asked them where they were from then asking if they lived in Orlando (they were from Louisiana and they never answered why they were in Orlando) or have trouble understanding what the complicated dessert known as “Chocolate Brownie” was... I swear, this is ALL true. If that wasn't bad enough, listening to them talk about football... they were the worst kind of whiny crying overdramatic drama queen. I was so happy to get away from those dumbasses. What Louisiana hicks.
Yep, I run into the most interesting people sometimes. When I post my next blog a week from today, I am not expecting it to be as entertaining as this blog was. I know I'll be talking about a pair of Chicago Bears games but that's about it.
No comments:
Post a Comment